Just Because
by cnfzdpsychosis
Summary: Axel finally understands what's going on with Roxas. It just needed to be beat into him.


A/N: This is kind of a sequal to Things I'll Never Say but it works as a stand alone as well. Again, beta'd by my lovely sister A Spot of Bother

Summary: Axel finally understands what's going on with Roxas. It just needed to be beat into him.

Just Because

Roxas was panicking; a serious, unrestrained panic. He had lost his notebook. His notebook, containing his heart poured out on a silver platter. It really shook him that he had lost something so precious to him, but his mind was a sordid affair as of late. He had gradually been avoiding Axel more and more and Axel had noticed, cornering him yesterday for a talk.

* * *

"Roxas, what's going on?" Roxas just shrugged.

"It's nothing, Axel, there's just been a lot going on." Axel ran a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated. Roxas took the chance to try and escape but Axel caught him around the waist, pushing him back into the corner and blocking his path with his body.

"Bullshit, Roxas! You just got back from wherever the hell you disappeared to, you don't say anything about it, you act like nothing's going on – and you've been avoiding me ever since Kairi and I started hanging out. I ask you if you want to do something, but no, you're always busy. Always, even if you're only scribbling in that damn notebook of yours. What's in it anyways?" He asked, grabbing the notebook from where Roxas kept it clutched to his chest.

"Axel, give it back!" Roxas yelled, lunging at his friend, but Axel easily evaded him.

"Not until you tell me what's in it!" He replied, avoiding Roxas again and moving to open the book. Roxas tackled him, grabbing it out of Axel's prying hands and leaping to his feet.

"It's none of you business! God, Axel! It doesn't matter, so just leave me alone!" Axel just stayed where he was on the ground, staring in confusion at Roxas' retreating form.

* * *

And now his notebook was missing. Roxas couldn't handle this. Not now. But it was happening, and so he sat on the floor of his bedroom and had a panic attack. He would love for someone to help him through it, would love it even more if that person was Axel but it wasn't going to happen – except that the doorbell was ringing in earnest as someone pounded on the door and, God, how long had that been going on for? So Roxas climbed to his feet and moved to his door. 'But why?' he thought. 'Why should I answer it? It's not worth it anymore, and definitely not worth the effort.' So sloth won out and the ringing subsided, but Roxas was feeling incredibly stupid standing in his room, so he let himself give over completely to sloth and fall onto his bed, burying his face in the pillow. And suddenly he couldn't stop the tears from falling, praying to God that whoever found his notebook would look at his name and give it back without opening it. Axel would hate him forever if he found out, and Roxas wasn't sure he could deal with that.

Fuck, that doorbell was pissing him off. He'd disconnect it one day, but now the phone was ringing. Whoever was trying to get in touch with him was nothing if not persistent, and Roxas fought the urge to pick up the phone and very politely tell them to fuck-off and leave him alone. But he couldn't do that. Roxas knew he could act with cruel intentions when he wanted to, but he wasn't that mean. So instead he simply lifted the receiver and sighed, "Hello?"

"Roxas, get your narrow ass down here and open this damn door or so help me I'll burn it down!" Roxas bit his lip, stifling a groan, but Axel had already hung up. And Axel was not who he wanted to hear from right now – but he did as demanded of him because he knew Axel was enough of a pyromaniac to follow through on his threat.

"God, you look like shit!" he exclaimed upon opening the door.

Axel cocked an eyebrow. "Been working on your greetings, I see."

Roxas let him in. "Do you want some ice? Or should I presume from your sarcastic remark that you're fine and it doesn't hurt if I do this?" Roxas smirked, poking Axel where a bruise had already begun to shine around his eye.

"Roxas, if you keep poking me in the face," Axel said evenly, grabbing the offending finger, "I'll bite your finger off."

"I offered you ice," Roxas snarled, yanking his hand away. Axel waved him off. "Besides, why are you even here? And what happened to your face?"

"Always the subtle one, Roxas. My face connected with Kairi's fist. Or vice versa." Roxas snickered.

"You got your ass kicked by a girl?" Axel just rolled his eyes, waiting for his fit of laughter to subside. "OK," Roxas gasped. "I'm done. So what did you do to piss her off?"

"You." Roxas gave him a skeptical look that clearly read, 'No you did not.' Axel sighed. "We got into a fight over you." Again Roxas raised an eyebrow and Axel sighed in frustration. "She found this," Axel said, tossing Roxas' notebook onto the table.

"My notebook…" Roxas blanched. "Say you didn't read it." Axel looked away. "Tell me you didn't read it." Roxas demanded.

"I read part of it." Axel mumbled but Roxas' fist had already connected, sending Axel to the floor. "Dammit Roxas, will you listen?" he demanded, grabbing both of Roxas' wrists.

"You had no right! You asshole, you had no right!" Roxas was still struggling, but he slowly stilled as Axel continued to talk.

"Kairi found it and read it. I got a knock on my door, opened it and got punched in the face. When I asked her why the hell she was beating me up I got told I was a blind asshole and that I should ask you." Roxas sat down, slumped in defeat, but he could still anticipate Axel's every move. "So, yes, I read the first entry of your notebook," he said, crossing his arms. "Something you want to tell me?"

Roxas glared up at him and melted. That smile, that stupid smile – that smug, self-assured smile that pissed Roxas off every time. It melted him. He stood, lifting his notebook, wavering in indecision until Axel gently grabbed it.

"You gonna let me finish it?" Roxas nodded.

_

* * *

__And just because I'll always be too afraid to say it. Just because no one else will ever read it. Just because I can write this here, right now. I love you, Axel."_

Axel shut the notebook, smiling. Standing, he stretched before climbing the stairs to Roxas' room. He had something he wanted to tell him, just because. Just because he was Roxas, and that was more than enough reason for Axel to love him.


End file.
